


Laughter is the Best Medicine

by MarcoBodtsChickenNuggets



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Comedy, F/F, F/M, Implied Marco Bott/Jean Kirstein, M/M, Mexican!connie, Mostly Fluff, Multi, comedian!connie, filipino!connie, implied previous sasha blouse/connie springer
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-19
Updated: 2014-09-11
Packaged: 2018-02-13 19:00:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2161608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarcoBodtsChickenNuggets/pseuds/MarcoBodtsChickenNuggets
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Connie isn't the kind of guy to flake out on a bet, especially if it involves showcasing his comedic skills. On the other hand Mikasa isn't the kind of girl that expresses much of, well, anything. So when Connie decides to take on the challenge of making said girl laugh, things take a surprising turn for the best, and Connie finds that Mikasa has the most beautiful laugh he has ever heard.</p><p>(On hiatus, but will be continued when time allows)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Well well well, looks like i actually did it. I've started the first official Mikonnie fic. I swear this started off as a crack ship and then one day they just consumed me. They've driven me to the point where i am now writing fanfiction. What can i say? I'm desperate. Hope you enjoy! And sorry this is kind of my first fic. 
> 
> my tumblr: http://marcobodtschickennuggets.tumblr.com/

"Mikasa sure is quieter than usual today." Jean points out to us, ignoring the fact that she happens to be sitting just a few feet away. _'Seriously Jean_ ’, I think, _'she's sitting at the same damn table'_.

"Meh, looks the same to me." Eren says through mouthfuls of his sandwich. I decide to sneak a glance towards today’s subject of conversation. There was Mikasa, as quiet as usual; listening to whatever Armin's nerd talk consisted of. Yup, the same as always.

"You guys think I can make her smile?" Jean asks, leaning in towards Eren and me with an idiotic smile.

"Dude, I'll fucking give ten bucks to whoever can make Mikasa laugh." Eren replies enthusiastically, encouraging Jean. 

"Deal!"

Oh man, this is going to be great. I'm definitely writing this down in my comedy sketch to-do list later on.

"I'll go first; I've known her my whole life, so this should be a piece of cake." Eren says, a little too loud as he scoots himself over to sit closer to Mikasa. I try to be oblivious of the whole situation, only tilting my head slightly, just enough to see through my peripheral vision, unlike Jean who straight out stares Eren down. A huge smirk plastered on his face. It’s hard to hear what Eren says through all the cafeteria noises but thankfully Mikasa's voice is loud enough to hear.

"Eren, you shouldn't make jokes like that, it's rude." She says coldly. Yeeesh, she sounds like my mom. Her face remains neutral as she turns back to continue conversing with Armin. Eren scoots back over to our group, mumbling a loud "Fuck."

Jean and I erupt into laughter, Jean obviously laughing as loud as possible on purpose to piss Eren off.

"Fuck you Jean! I'd like to see YOU fucking try!" Eren spits out in anger.

"It would be my pleasure, Eren." Jean coos as he quickly stands up and makes his way to sit in between Eren and Mikasa. He awkwardly scoots closer and closer to his victim, being as graceful as a teenage boy who’s about to talk to his crush can be. If I thought Eren's attempt was funny, Jean's is sure to be hilarious. Jean gives us a confident look before turning his head towards Mikasa. Oh man, this is going to be fucking GOLD.

"I can't believe you guys are encouraging this." Marco groans, putting his face in his palms to shield his eyes from the disaster to come.

Jean is much louder than Eren when he finally decides to speak. "H-hey Mikasa." Jean starts horribly, stumbling on his words. Mikasa simply nods her head in reply. I wait in anticipation, shifting my body towards the conversation to hear Jean better.

"So-uh, fuck, hmm oh! Why did the uh ch-chicken cross the road?" I cannot believe what I’m hearing right now, he can’t be fucking serious. I have to bite down hard on my lip to keep from interrupting the awkward silence with the laughter threatening to escape my lips.

"Shit," Mikasa starts "do we have a psychology test tomorrow?"

 "W-what?" Jean stutters yet again.

"I haven't studied that yet. That’s one of those trick questions you ask patients to check their mental state, right?" Mikasa asks, honestly confused. Wow, Jean sure knows how to fuck up real bad. The look of pure confusion on Mikasa's face is enough to bring me and Eren into a fit of laughter. Jean doesn't even reply after that, he just stands and walks back to his spot, head hanging. I laugh for about a good couple of minutes before I finally find the strength to calm down.

"There, there Jean, you tried your best." Marco comforts him, patting his back softly. Jean just stares at his lap, mumbling to himself.

"You should try it Marco!" Eren teases.

"Me? Oh no! I am not getting involved in another one of your bets." Marco replies, still rubbing soothing circles along Jean’s back.

This is it; this is my chance to prove that I am the greatest comedian that ever lived. If I can get the cold, emotionless, Mikasa Ackerman to laugh, then I, Connie Springer, can fucking make _anyone_ laugh.

"My tuuurn!" I practically sing out.

"Good luck Springer." Eren remarks sarcastically, saluting me.

“You know what Eren, I am so confident in my skills that you can fucking keep your ten bucks." I reply smoothly. I truly am a kind and humble man.

Eren laughs, "Fuck man, go ahead." he struggles to talk through his thick chuckles. "Shit, if _I_ can't make her laugh, then _no one_ can!"

His pestering is music to my ears. I love a good challenge and I most certainly am not about to back out now. This. _This_ is what I'm good at. I'm the funny guy, the comedic relief. There's no doubt in my mind (okay maybe a little) that I can make Mikasa Ackerman laugh.

 I bounce up out of my seat, rubbing my now sweaty palms on my jeans. I sit next to Mikasa and decide to start off with some small talk.

"Hey Mikasa, how are ya?" Smooth. She turns her head to look at me. Shit, she's scary.

"I'm fine. And you?" She says, sounding bored.

"I'm doing great! Thanks for asking!" I give her my best smile. First step to being a successful comedian is to always warm up to the audience first. Build up to your joke or jokes and stay confident at all times.

I give her a few seconds of silence, trying to decide which one of my clever jokes to use. I lean in close enough so that only she can hear and give her one of my best one liners. It's only a matter of seconds before she's pulling up her scarf towards her nose, trying desperately to hide the loud chuckles that escape her now smiling lips.

Holy shit, I actually did it. Wow, her laugh sure is cute. I decide to hit her with another joke, encouraging more laughter. Her laughs become louder, and I'm pretty sure I just heard her snort. Cute. I turn my head to look at my friends, who all stare in disbelief. I truly am amazing.

Mikasa finally settles down, looking absolutely embarrassed, and kind of pissed. Oh. Oh no. Oh shit. I'm so fucking dead! She stares at me for what feels like hours, her checks red and eyebrows furrowed. That's it, time to say goodbye to all my loved ones. I start on my will.

_Dear family and friends,_

_I would like to give all my possessions to-_

"You're pretty funny, Connie," Mikasa says, back to her cool and collected demeanor.

"T-thanks! I wanted to practice my one liners so I thought I'd try one on you!" I respond nervously.

"Not bad." She says flatly. Holy crap, did she just smile at me? I swear I saw her mouth twitch up.

"Well uh, thanks for letting me try one on ya, see ya later!" And with that I walk back to my awe stricken friends. “No need for applause gentlemen! I'll be here all night." I boast, letting my now high self-esteem take control.

"How did yo- WHAT?!?" Jean yells in disbelief.

"I'm sorry I ever doubted you Con-man." Eren apologizes, shock still evident on his face. I do the honors of bowing as they applaud quietly, so to not bring any suspicion. I give each of them a high-five, trying to ignore the fact that Mikasa’s laugh is still echoing in my ears, and most definitely ignoring the image of her adorable smile. Shit. Did I just say adorable? I never really realized how pretty she is until now. I mean, sure that's all Jean ever talks about but I never really paid it much attention. It's not like I've never had a crush on a girl or have never found any of them cute. Sasha and I dated for a while. It was awkward though, like dating my fucking sister. She's still my best friend though and I plan on keeping it that way. Who else is going to laugh at my new material?

Mikasa’s smile flashes in my mind again. Ugh, having crushes is gross. I've talked to Mikasa before so why am I so worked up now? Sure she's pretty, but I'm like a 7 and she's totes a level 10 hottie.

As I walk to my math class, and all throughout the rest of the day, up to the point where I find myself tucked in bed, only one though was on my mind. Fuck, I've got a crush on Mikasa Ackerman.

 

* * *

 

The next few days go on uneventfully, well, except for the fact that I've had some sort of epiphany about my new found crush on Mikasa. Sasha and I sit side by side in the cafeteria, her munching the only thing piercing the silence around us. Jean has a project, and Marco has to work on his essay for Lit, so it's just me and Sasha, whom I am trying _desperately_ to keep from eating my chips.

"You sure are quiet today." Sasha tells me through her stuffed mouth.

"Eh, I don't know, just thinking 'bout stuff." Mikasa's smile to be exact, but I leave that part out. Shit, I hardly know her and here I am thinking all this lame ass cheesy stuff. _'I should try and talk to her again'_ , I muse.

I'm pretty sure there's some unspoken rule about having to at least know _ten_ facts about someone before they're aloud to become your crush. I only have like five. The first being her full name, that's a handy one. The second is her being Eren's step-sister, so I better be an extra kiss ass to him. Numbers three and four consists of the undeniable fact that she has the most beautiful smile and laugh ever. And lastly, that she is _waaay_ out of my fucking league. I sigh loudly at the last horrible truth.

"You know when I make a comment on the lack of conversation, that's your cue to start talking." Sasha tells me, clearly annoyed with my silence, but I can't find myself to care and shrug my shoulders. My eyes stalk the cafeteria, looking to find Mikasa's whereabouts. To my surprise she sits alone, no one willing to dare sit with her. Except maybe me. I begin to contemplate the idea of seriously going to join her.

     "Sasha, I'm going to go sit with Mikasa, don't wait up for me." Sasha is just as surprised by my statement as I am. She does a spit take, her lunch now soaked in juice.

"W-WHAT?!?" She chokes out through the coughing fit caused by the juice that betrayed her throat. I don't give her the chance to question me any further. My feet take control and I find myself walking towards the lonely Mikasa. I take a deep ragged breath, trying to find my courage. Shit, I really didn't think this through, but hey, I'm a doer not a thinker.

I take a seat across from Mikasa, being as quiet as I can. She has some sort of super hearing though because her head automatically shoots up the second I sit myself down. She stares at me and then returns to the book in her hands. "Hey! You looked kind of lonely so I'd thought I'd join ya." I try to sound as non-threatening as possible. For the first time, being cautious with the words that come out of my mouth. She doesn't reply so I take the liberty to try again. "Where are Eren and Armin?"

I finally get a reply, thank you Jesus! "Armin's helping Eren with his physics project." Simple and to the point, and there will definitely be no elaboration. This is hard, ‘ _think Connie, think_!’ All I want is to see that smile of hers again but Mikasa isn't the most cooperative person when it comes to simple conversation. I notice her food tray in front of her, only half eaten. I'm struck with sudden inspiration.

I quickly grab the orange and begin to peel it, just enough so that I'm able to get two orange slices. Mikasa gives me a death stare, and I can tell she's about to say something but I already have my props ready. I quickly put the orange slices up to my eyebrows and muster up the deepest voice I can get.

" _I’M PRINCIPLE ERWIN SMITH AND MY EYEBROWS ARE AS THICK AS MY DICK_!" Mikasa chokes from shock, pulling up her scarf as she begins to giggle adorably. Man I never want that laughter to stop. So I grab a napkin and tuck it into my shirt like a bib, ditching the orange slices.

" _AYE STOP LAUGHING BRAT_!" I yell as I get out of my seat, falling to my knees at an attempt to look shorter. I walk on my knees while I cross my arms across my chest. That definitely gets her to laugh louder. Soon enough the cute snorts that I've fallen for startup as well. Her laughter ends abruptly and she's suddenly staring straight at me. _No_. Straight behind me.

"Connie Springer! You sure do enjoy detention don't you? And I'm surprised at you miss Ackerman, detention for you both!" Levi. Shit. I look back to see Mikasa's reaction but her face is unreadable. She must fucking hate my guts right now. I've ruined everything, all I wanted was to get her to smile just once and now I'll probably end up _dead_ , buried where no one can find my body.

Levi stomps away, muttering to himself, claiming that he isn't even _that_ short. I stand up, off my knees and turn to look up at Mikasa again. Sigh, I'm really going to miss her laugh. I watch her eyes, following them to where Levi has left the cafeteria. She starts to laugh again the second Levi is out of sight. I just stare, with my mouth gaping as she rips the napkin from where I tucked it, and tucks it into her own shirt. My eyes go even wider when she clears her through, preparing herself.

" _IM LEVI AND I LIKE THAT IM SHORT 'CAUSE I GET TO HAVE ERWINS ASS IN MY FACE ALL DAY_!" She says in the most unbelievably monotone voice. I laugh. I laugh so hard I fall to the floor clenching at my sides, the familiar pain that comes from laughing too hard hitting me. I try and gasp for air but end up laughing even louder when I hear Mikasa’s beginning chortles. I look up to see that numerous people have started to stare. Mikasa notices soon as well and quickly hides her now red face in her scarf. I get up off the floor, take the napkin and stuff it quickly into my pocket.

"That was pretty good, but put some emotion into it next time." I say chuckling. She gives me a simple nod.

I'm still in shock at how out of character that was for her. Here was the most serious person on the planet, making an _ass_ joke as if it was the most natural thing on earth. It's rare to see her smile, and her laughing is just unheard of, but here I am, hearing it as clear as day.

"Sorry I got you in trouble." I mumble, still kind of worried, rubbing the back of my neck.

"It's fine. Levi needs to learn to lighten up.” She responds.

I'm really starting to hate the bell; it interrupts, sending us to our last class of the day. Damn, I still really want to keep talking to Mikasa. She's surprisingly really cool.

"Hey, let's walk to class together." I suggest. I should really start thinking before I speak. Luckily she seems to still be in a good mood and gives me a nod in agreement. We walk in awkward silence towards our math class together. I'm used to detention but knowing that I got Mikasa in trouble too is really starting to bother me. Mikasa isn't much of a conversation starter, so I’m surprised when she decides to be the first to break the silence.

 "How did you learn to do that?" She questions me.

"What? Make jokes?" I ask back, honestly confused by her question. Another silent nod. "I don't know,” I play with the straps of my backpack, trying to avoid making eye contact, "I've just always liked making people laugh and jokes are the easiest way. There's different kind of jokes too, like the first time I made you laugh, those are one liners. Then what I just did during lunch are impersonations. There are also run-on jokes, puns and sketches. The last two are my favorites." I ramble, always getting passionate when it comes to comedy. Shit, I hope I'm not boring her.

"Hmm, I didn't know there was a science to it." She concludes, considering my words as we walk into class. We end up sitting together, ‘ _way to go Connie!’_ I give myself a mental high-five.

"Yeah, puns are super fun." I add.

"What's a _pun_?"

Hmmm, how do I explain puns to a girl I am just _now_ finding out actually has a sense of humor? I try to stick to a simple explanation.

"Well, it's a play on words. You change the definition or sound of a word or words by replacing it with the subject or somet-Ugh- you know what let me just show you." I grab a pencil from my backpack and break the leaded side. “Wow, having a broken pencil sure is POINT-less."

 Yes, I just broke my pencil for the sake of a pun; I am _very_ passionate about puns. "Oooh." Mikasa nods in understanding, a small smile on her lips. Damn even the smallest of smiles on her face are pretty. “I see. It’s pointless because it won't be able to write, but it's also lacking a physical point, thus creating a double meaning, very clever." She explains, much better than my own attempt at an explanation.

Eventually Mr. Oluo decides to finally join us for class. Fucking teachers always showing up late to their own classes when we're forced to show up in less than three minutes. The moment he opens his mouth I blank out, boredom consuming me in less than five seconds. I amuse myself by trying to see how many dicks I can draw on my notebook before class ends. I'm suddenly very hyper aware of the fact that Mikasa's sitting a few feet away and move my notebook more towards the side. Hoping she doesn't see how immature I am. Though using orange slices as makeshift eyebrows isn't very mature either.

I continue to doodle in my notebook until class ends. _'Should I wait for Mikasa?_ ' I ask myself, ‘we _both have detention anyways_.'

"You're _quite_ the artist." Mikasa says sarcastically. Holy cow, she's capable of sarcasm too? Hot damn.

I struggle to put on my backpack, thinking of an excuse for my immaturity. "Oh that?" I chuckle nervously. "That was just- um, fuck, t-there's no explaining that is there?" I sigh, coming to terms with the fact that there is absolutely _no_ explanation for the 121 dicks drawn in my notebook. Yes I counted.

"You're very strange Connie." She tells me, as if I didn't know that already.

"L-let's get going, don't want Levi to extend our jail time, do we?" I try desperately to change the subject.

We walk in silence yet again, making our way to the end of the crowded hallway where detention is held. "Sorry," I apologize again, "I feel really shitty about the whole detention thing." still worried as hell. Fuck I just really want her to like me. Having crushes suck. Follow my advice when I say, never ever have a crush.

"It’s fine." she says, but then surprises me when she strays from her usual one sentence response. "Connie, you’re an idiot, but I find you very amusing. Therefore I’m having a very hard time being upset at you, as I should be, given the circumstances." Even the way she talks is pretty. _'Holy shit she doesn't hate me!_ ' I gasp internally, _‘she thinks I'm funny!'_.

We walk into the detention room where Levi waits for us in the corner desk. Dozens of perfectly placed posters of muscles and organs sit on the walls, each the exact same distance apart from each other. This isn't even Levi's classroom but I'm pretty sure he had something to do with the cleanliness of the room. Mikasa quietly sits down. I sit down a desk behind her, following the one desk distance rule of detention.

"Hope you brats think long and hard about your actions, and _come up with some better jokes_!" He growls at us, but the threat leans more towards me. Levi stands to make his way to the door, going to lock it. He stares at us the whole time, not trusting us for a second. The moment he sits back down there's a knock at the door, inducing a few curses from the already grumpy Levi. He opens the door for Ymir, late as always.

"Why am I _not_ surprised? Another extension on your detention Ymir. I swear it's like you kids _enjoy_ spending your time in awkward silence with me." Levi lectures.

My eyes find their way to the back of Mikasa's head as soon as Ymir sits herself down, the entertainment now over. Her hair shines under the flickering florescent lights of the classroom. She really rocks short hair, most people preferred her hair when it was longer, but I bet she could shave it and still look fucking hot as hell. I brush my hands along the stubble of my buzz cut at the thought. Hmm, I wonder if she prefers short or long hair. Maybe I should grow my hair out. A screeching ring blares from the classroom phone as I contemplate my newest hairstyle.

“Hello?” Weird how peoples voices always tend to get higher when they talk to someone new on the phone. Levi is not an exception. “ _Now **?”**_ His voice goes back down to its usual octave, must be Erwin. “I’m busy. No. Bu- _fine,_ but you fucking owe me eyebrows.” And with that Levi hangs up, obviously annoyed. He stands up and proceeds to stare us down for a good minute or two. He may be short, but he is fucking scary as shit. Fuck, short people are scary in general. Sure, I may be shorter than Levi but I don’t let my height give me a _short-_ temper. Ha-ha, get it _SHORT_ temper? Man I have got to stop making internal monologue puns.

“I know it’s hard for you dumbbells, but don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone, or ill extend all of your detentions.” He threatens us. We all shake our heads in agreement and he rushes out, slamming the door behind him unnecessarily.

“Igottagotakeadump!” Ymir shouts as she runs out the door a second later. It’s just me, and Mikasa, _perfect_. 

I tap her shoulder softly until she turns her body to look at me. “H-hey” I supply, not really sure what to say, and honestly just wanting to start a conversation. I hate awkward silences.

“Hi.” She replies, staring into my soul with dark cold eyes. I quickly shift my eyes, not quite yet brave enough to make eye contact. I find my hands to be quite interesting and pick at the nail of my thumb mindlessly.

“Why are you so quiet all the time?” I blurt out. Well that wasn’t what I was planning on saying at _all_! Why she got to make me so damn nervous? I’m acting worse than fucking _Jean_ , and _that’s_ saying something!

She shrugs her shoulders. “I don’t have anything to say.”

“Okay but seriously, you look fucking depressed all the time. Why are you so serious? I know Annie does it ‘cause she’s just emotionally fucked up or some shit, but you’re fucking cool as hell.” Wow, my brain is sucking right now.

“I don’t see what there is to be so happy about.” She answers plainly.

“But yet you find _me_ funny, of all people?” I continue to pester her. She gives me a small nod and an even smaller smile.

“Why are _you_ so happy all the time? That big grin you always have on your face makes you look stupid.” She asks me. Damn, she’s fucking sassy. I like it.

“Because, there’s no point in being all sad when I have such awesome friends. There’s always something awesome going on, like yesterday Eren totally farted in economics class. It was fucking hilarious!” I chuckle, remembering Eren’s angry and embarrassed face.

“Understandable.” Is all I get.

She rests her elbow on the edge of the desk, resting her chin on her hand. This time she doesn’t look bored, just neutral, probably in thought. I can’t keep myself from staring at her, watching her eyes closely as they scan the posters on the room. Her dark eyelashes fluttering in the most hypnotizing way each time her eyes move or blink. I quickly look away when she looks over at me. Shit, I hope she didn’t catch me staring.

Like the holy saint he is, Levi comes back into the room, saving my poor embarrassed ass. “Where’s Ymir?” he spares no time in noticing the absence of a tall freckled girl with an attitude. He sighs loudly, “I’ll be back.” and walks towards the door for about the sixth time today.

“She’s probably making out with Christa.” I muse, to which Mikasa just nods. Doesn’t her head hurt from all that nodding? She must need a break from all that talking. She’s probably talked more today than she’s ever had in a whole year. I really want to talk to her again, but the fear of annoying her stops me each time I try to open my mouth.

Ymir and Levi walk in a few minutes later. “Making out with miss Reiss while you’re supposed to be in detention is a new low for you Ymir.  Poor girl, I have no idea how she puts up with you.” Levi lectures her. They then sit at their previous sits, both probably annoyed at one other.

“Now, I want complete silence for the last ten minutes of detention, so no talking!” he practically yells, he must have given up putting up with our shit by now.

Boredom finds me and the silence makes my head hurt. I shuffle around in my backpack, looking for something to keep me occupied, and find a slip of paper and pen. I write out a note, and as stealth like as possible, tap on Mikasa’s shoulder and deliver it.

**Im bored**

**Lets play a game C;**

I watch her take out a pen from her sack and quickly write out a response. She passes it to me, smoothly using an under hand approach to hide the action from Levi’s sight, being as nonchalant as possible. 

_What Kind?_

_Oh my gosh_ , even her writing is cute. For some reason this makes me blush like an idiot.

**I say the 1 st part of a joke**

**& then u finsh 4 me  & then we swich** 

I pass the note up, becoming slightly better at being sneaky. I wait eagerly for her reply, practically jumping up and down in my seat.

_Okay_

I giggle quietly as I read the one word response and quickly write out the first half of my joke.

**why does levi lik 2 clean so much???**

I smile at all the great punch lines that could be used, but absolutely nothing compares to the response I end up getting.

_Because he likes the smell of shit so much_

_he cleans it just to be near it._

I burst out into booming laughter, but quickly start fake coughing to try and hide the outburst.  I mumble a quick “sorry” towards Levi who just rolls his eyes.

**WTF wow that was SO bad**

**ur turn btw**

We continue to play until only a few minutes of detention remain. A clever idea hits me and I don’t even have time to think it through before I’m writing it out and passing it forward.

**Ayeeee what did Mikasa say**

**when Connie asked her out???**

I clench my eyes closed, praying that I don’t get punched in the face or killed. It isn’t until I feel something brush my finger that I open my eyes and find the slip of paper on my desk.

_I don’t see how that’s supposed to_

_have a funny response?_

I was hoping for a yes or no answer but before I can write out an explanation that says I was trying to be smooth, Mikasa’s hand finds the paper and she quickly takes it back. She writes quickly, I see her pause before she commences again. She hesitates as she hands me the paper, her hand almost seems to be shaking, but I dismiss it quickly. That’s not like her; she’s probably just cold or something.

_My turn._

_What did Connie say when Mikasa’s reply_

_to the previously asked question is a yes?_

Holy. Fucking. SHIT. Is this for real? I gasp loudly and start my fake coughing again just in case. 

**????ARE YOU FOR REAL RIGHT NOW????**

_I’m not joking, even though that_

_is the purpose of this game._

Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit! HOLY FUCKING SHIT DICK RIDING A UNICORN!

**DUDE im lik in shock rite now**

**WTF holy shit**

_Such a gentlemen._

**Srry butt im lik dead rite now**

_How are we supposed to go out on our_

_date if your dead?_

Damn it. I squeal internally like the manly grown up I am. My brain is still trying to make sense of what the fuck just happened. I honestly didn’t think she would say yes, fuck I didn’t even mean to fucking write that, what the fuck. How did this even happen? Honestly, if Mikasa were to be with anyone I would think it would at least be Eren even if that _is_ weird as fuck but still. Not me. Noooope, I am the last person on this planet I would ever think she would say yes to. Fuck she has said no to Jean so many times, why me? I mean sure I’m a handsome devil but I also know I’m the biggest dumb ass at this whole fucking school. I let my confusion take control of my next response.

**WHY??**

_Haha, don’t you want me to say yes?_

_Besides you make me laugh. :)_

A fucking smiley face? My cheeks should not be as hot as they are now and not be melting my face off. I scream internally once more, and bang my head on the desk, _hard_ , in a failed attempt to wake myself up from this obvious dream.

“All right you bad excuses for the future of tomorrow, get out of here! Don’t let me catch you being idiots again, except you Ymir. You have two more weeks of detention to make up.” Levi says, dismissing us finally.

I stay in my seat for a few minutes, still in shock. Mikasa’s already walking out the door when I finally come to terms with what has just happened. I almost trip on my own feet trying to catch up with her, but she’s gone before I can reach her. I hold the note where the evidence of our conversation is written. I don’t dare let it go, not as I walk to my rusty truck, not as I put it into reverse and drive home, not as I greet my mother and sister when I arrive, and most certainly not as I lay in bed, replaying the whole day in my mind. It isn’t until I fall asleep that my hand unclenches. If it wasn’t for my unconscious mind and my resting fingers, I’d keep it tight in my hand for fear of it disappearing. For fear of waking up, and having it all been a dream.  


	2. No Joke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Connie, being the excitable human bean he is, ends up telling all his friends about his romantic advances.... But no one seems to believe him... Not even himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took way longer than it should have... but i hope you enjoy this new chapter! And thank you to all the people who have joined the Mikonnie ship, i hope they make you suffer as much as I have c:
> 
> warning: lots of bad dick puns....

Sasha’s laughter echoes throughout the whole cafeteria, it’s gotten to the point where we’ve received countless stares and some slightly rude comments.  But by now I’m just pissed at the fact that she still refuses to fucking believe me. I was so excited that Mikasa had said yes to my request at a date that I ended up telling, or in this case  _trying_ to tell my friends the good news. I tried Reiner but he just fucking giggled and patted my back like it was just another one of my jokes or some shit. What the fuck? Then I tried Bertholdt but he also decided it was funny as hell and laughed for like ten minutes. Of course he felt guilty after he saw that I was serious and ran away sweating. Heck I even tried telling the fucking school janitor in my desperate attempt for approval, and even they started laughing right then and there. Why is it so hard for everyone to believe that she might actually say yes to going out with me? And now Sasha, who was supposed to be my home girl here, is just  _laughing_  right in my fucking face. Hello, it's like everyone forgot I have feelings.  

 

“Ah-hah-I I’m so sorry,” she manages to breathe out through her obnoxious cackles. “It’s just  _YOU,_  an-and  _MIKASA_?” she throws her head back and resumes her laughter. I roll my eyes, honestly just sick at this point at the lack of trust I’m getting here. Why do I even bother? But the small pain in my heart urges me to continue to try and explain for about the tenth time today. 

 

“I swear Sasha!” I’m practically begging at this point. “I asked her out, and she said yes! Come on, even you saw that I made her laugh.”

 

Sasha wipes an invisible tear from her eye and sighs as if she’s just had the most therapeutic laughing session ever. “Dude, everyone knows you made her laugh, but that was one time and do you honestly think people will believe that whole story about her saying yes?” she sighs and thankfully starts taking the matter more seriously. “Look, I’m not saying this to be mean or anything. I’m saying this as your friend and I’m just looking out for you. I know you never lie but it’s just really hard to believe the whole thing. Trust me it’s not you, it’s just the idea of Mikasa being interested in  _anyone_ is just ridiculous. Have you seen how many times she’s rejected not only Jean, but a bunch of other people as well? All I’m saying is you’re Connie, and she’s, well, Mikasa. There’s just no way that could ever happen. No offense.”

 

Of course she says no offense right after she’s just offended me. ‘ _Thanks Sasha, you’re_ _such_ _a great friend’_.  I let out a frustrated groan, fisting my hands into my eye sockets. 

 

“Fuck Sasha, ill prove it to you, you’ll see! You’ll all see!” I screech at her dramatically. Shit, but how  _am_  I going to prove it to her. I left the note from last week at home safe under my pillow. If only I could just walk up to Mikasa and have her tell Sasha herself…wait! Why don’t I just have Mikasa tell Sasha herself! Brilliant! I am a revolutionary genius. 

 

I jump up from my seat, grab Sasha by the arm, causing her to drop whatever she was about to shove in her mouth, and run across the cafeteria to where Mikasa is seated with Eren and Armin. Once I arrive I make myself comfortable next to Mikasa and usher Sasha to take the seat next to me. 

 

“Aye, hey Connie, hey Sasha! How’s it going?” Eren is the first to greet us, followed by a bright smile from Armin and a soft hello from Mikasa. 

 

If it wasn’t for my acute awareness of everything Mikasa does whenever she’s present, I might not have noticed the quick action of her hiding a small smile with her scarf. But of course I notice, and unfortunately no one else does. Sasha’s the one that needs convincing not me damn it. However I do find it making my day a hundred times better, not to mention it makes my face heat up faster than should be humanly possible. 

 

I quickly remind myself of my mission and grab Sasha’s attention, “Here, watch _this_ , this will prove it to you.” I smirk at her and see that everyone else is staring too, having heard my comment. 

 

“Prove wh-?” Eren starts but is quickly cut off as I lean in and whisper the first thing that comes to my mind into Mikasa’s ear. 

 

 _“I can’t wait for our date.”_ I whisper softly, making sure to let my voice drop a few octaves. I feel her tense up and my face grows hotter in reply. I quickly lean back to watch for any other form of reaction. She's completely red. But not just any red, her whole face is a deep crimson that creeps up to the tips of her ears and even makes it way towards her neck. There is absolutely  _no_ hiding that, no matter how high she pulls up her scarf. I’m just about to congratulate myself when I see Mikasa rush up from her seat and out towards the exit.  _SHIT!_  I fucked up! I done fucked up real bad!  _FUCK_ , ill apologize later though, right now I need to rub it in Sasha’s face. 

 

“ _See_. I made her blush! That’s proof that she likes me.” I boast. 

 

Eren is the one that starts laughing this time, not Sasha. “Oh  _please_! She was probably just embarrassed to be seen with you!” He cackles. 

 

Not this shit again. What do I got to do? Kiss her in damn public or something? We haven’t even held hands yet! I ain’t ready for that shit. 

 

“Yeah Connie, that didn’t prove much of anything.” Sasha adds. Damn it, I just embarrassed Mikasa for no reason. 

 

“Dude! I swear. I asked her out and she said yes! You guys  _have_  to believe me! You believe me, right Armin?” I ask him, absolutely desperate for any form of approval. Something, anything. I give him my best puppy dog eyes and pout my lip, hoping it could persuade him.

 

I watch him shift nervously in his seat, looking anywhere but at me before finally speaking up. “W-well, the probability of a yes is exactly point zero two percent, if I’ve calculated correctly. I’m sorry. I believe you, it’s just, numbers never lie…” 

I let out a loud groan and hide my face in my hands. Shit, even Armin is getting all mathematical and stuff about the fact that, yeah Connie, you have absolutely  _no_  chance what so ever.  I’m pissed as hell. Actually I’m just really fucking sad. The fact is, they’re right, she probably just felt sorry for me or something. Then again Mikasa isn’t one to lie for the sake of making someone feel better. Does she even really like me? ‘ _Just ask her and find out’._ Oh, thanks me, good thinking.

 

I'm about to leave but Eren clears his throat, grabbing my attention. "Hey Connie… I feel pretty bad about not believing you but, come on dude. Okay, how about… if you and Mikasa do end up going on a date, I'll give you fifty bucks." He raises his eyebrows at me, trying to tempt me to take the bait. Wow. He honestly does not believe me one bit. "Heck, if you two become a legit couple, I'll freaking let you be first player whenever you come over to play." He adds on to his deal. 

 

"Can I also get your blessing, if that happens?" I ask, taking advantage of the situation. 

 

"Sure thing man, but if none of that happens I'm going to need fifty bucks in return. I got to pay the bills somehow." He gives me a smug grin. 

 

Fuck it. Fuck him. Mikasa does like me. She said yes, and she wouldn't agree to a date with just anyone. Would she? No. Those fifty dollars are mine, you know what, I don't care about the cash, I get Eren's fucking  _blessing._ Hell yeah I can date Mikasa. Oh shit, Mikasa. I need to go apologize. I'm such a dick, not to mention I just technically made a bet on her, I'm disgusting. 

 

 I get up as fast as I can, running towards the exit in a flash almost forgetting my back pack in the process. 

 

"I'll take that as a yes!" I hear Eren yell. I don't look back though, I just run, letting my shoes smack against the tiled floors of the hallway.  I try to find Mikasa, stopping at every girl’s restroom to see if she'd walk out. With no luck I continue to speed through the whole campus. My lungs begin to ache as they works overtime trying to keep up with the ragged breaths that shake my body. It's not until I bump into someone that I finally halt. A very strong someone at that. They hardly flinch as I ram right into their back, a soft grunt spilling from my lips. 

 

"Shit. S-sorry!" I blurt out. "Wait a minute. Mikasa! I've been looking  _everywhere_  for you." I say breathlessly, letting my relief ring through my words. 

 

"Why is that?" She asks me. She looks confused, but it doesn't seem to be from seeing me, but instead from the idea that I had been searching for her. Oh my gosh. Is she not mad at me? Even though I did something wrong? I  _did_  do something wrong,  _right?_ "

 

"I wanted to apologize." I pause, staring at my feet. Cautiously, I begin my apology. "I'm sorry I embarrassed you, I didn't mean to make you run away or anything, I just wanted to prove to Sasha that you said yes to going out with me. I wanted to show them that you like-like me. No one believes me." The cheerfulness that once stained my voice is replaced by sad mumbles. I sound like a fucking baby.

 

"Oh, it’s okay, I'm not mad if that's what you're getting at. You just caught me by surprise and I left to get some air." She responds calm and sweet.

 

"Wait, you're seriously not mad? I mean, what about me telling Sasha? I also kind of told a few other people 'cause I was sort of excited. Sorry... Not that it matters though since they don't even believe me." I let out a shaky sigh. My hands pull at the hem of my shirt, nervously looking for something to do.

 

"Of course not. I don't care who you tell. Why don't they believe you though?" She honestly doesn't know. Shit. I mean it's pretty obvious but then again Mikasa's pretty humble about the whole 'I'm at the top of the class' thing.

 

"Uh, hello, you're Mikasa Ackerman, and, I'm...I’m just…  _Connie_." I feel my voice get smaller, almost cracking when spitting out my own name, as it repeats what I've been hearing all day. 

 

"Yeah, I know you're Connie, what's wrong with that? That's the reason I said yes to going out with you in the first place. You are  _you,_ and that's who I chose, not anyone else. So why do you say it as if the fact that you're you is a bad thing?" She looks down at me with concern. Her eyes looking for some sort of response. God she's so close. I can see the little grey flecks that stain her black eyes from this distance. 

 

I remember that she's waiting for me to answer. "They say you're too good for me." I explain. "That I could never have a chance with you, and they're right..." I sigh, averting my eyes, embarrassed to look her in the eyes. I feel unworthy of her.

 

I jerk back as I feel her put her hands on my shoulders. I look up at her just in time to see her lean in. The grip on my shoulders is almost painful. I wait. Anticipating. Hoping. But she just stares at me before huffing out a sigh.

 

"Connie, do you honestly think I said yes out of spite or pity?" I shift my weight so that I lean in closer, enjoying the way her breath ghosts over my lips as she speaks. "I said yes because I meant yes and I don't regret it one bit. Even if no one believes you, at least you'll have the pleasure of proving them wrong. Right?"

 

I nod my head slowly. My mouth forming a smile at her words. All too soon she releases me from her tight grip and gives me a soft smile. Damn, she really cares about me. It doesn't take an idiot to figure that out. I want to hug her, or kiss her, something to show her how much I appreciate the kind words, but she's already walking away. I didn't even notice the bell rang. 

 

"Aren't you coming?" She calls out to me. Oh. She wants me to join her. Awesome! I run up to her and we walk together to our last class.

 

Sadly because of our little ' _novella'_  in the hallway we arrive with only a few seconds to spare. There's hardly any empty seats so we agree on sitting away from each other,  _just_  for today. She takes a seat in the front while I make myself comfy next to Jean who was kind enough to save me a seat. Hmm I haven't seen him around lately, he's probably still working on that dumb chemistry project, which I have yet to start on of course. 

 

"Holy shit dude, did you just walk in with Mikasa?" He whispers to me in the most fucking excited voice ever. He sounds like a 13 year old girl talking about her latest crush.

 

"Yeaaah..." I respond cautiously, still not sure if I should tell him about the situation for fear of being put down,  _again_.  

 

"Duuuuude, props to you man! Shit, what did ya do to make her even acknowledge you? Seriously hook me up!" He sounds fucking stoked as hell. Wait. Did he just ask me to 'hook him up’? What the fuck Jean? I was just starting to get excited about the idea that you might actually believe me. 

 

"Um sorry to tell you this dude, but I'm kind of taking her out on a date, so..." 

 

"What?!? You hitting that? Why didn't you tell me!?"

 

"Wait up, you actually believe me?" I ask, stunned that the guy who's been crushing on Mikasa for years is the one who ends up believing me.

 

"Duh, why wouldn't I? The Con-man never lies, and let's not forget you totally made her laugh so I wouldn't be surprised if you two were getting it on already. You guys  _have_  fucked right?" He wiggles his eyebrows at the last question.

 

"Dude  _NO!"_ I yell, a blush staining my cheeks. “I’m just getting to know her better. I want to at least take her out to dinner first, jesh." I find myself losing track of my tongue. "Ya know, I want to talk to her about our hopes and dreams, and hold her hand, and kiss her on her adorable face, and take her on cute dates, and make her laugh." I let out a dreamy sigh. 

 

Shit. I so lost track of what the fuck I was even saying. But damn it, I meant  _every_  word.  

 

"That's hella gay." Jean chuckles.

 

"Dude, we're of opposite genders you dickbutt. I think you need to look up the definition of gay. If anything your gay for thinking that's gay, you  _gay_ gay." I swear I'm better at insults, but right now my mind is a gooey mess after suffering from all those fluffy thoughts about Mikasa.  

 

I can't believe Mr. Oluo hasn't noticed how loud our whispers have gotten.

 

Jean gasps, pretending to be offended. "Dude I am not gay. The most homosexual thing I would ever do is give a bro-job, and even that isn’t gay, that’s helping a brother out in a desperate time of need." Jean's a real idiot sometimes, but right now I'm just relived that he believes me.

 

"Jean, the whole concept of a bro-job is hella gay, seriously dude, would you give one to  _Eren?"_ I tease him.

 

He scrunches up his nose in disgust. “Ew gross, fuck no, that's nasty!" His voice cracks from trying to keep his voice at a whisper as he screams. 

 

"Okay, what about me?" I give him a cheeky grin and even wink for dramatic effect.

 

"Fuck no, Springer!" 

 

"Hmmm, okay, okay, how about Marco?" I question him. Actually very curios to hear his answer, but also trying to get it through his thick skull that, yes, bro-jobs are hella gay.

 

"Of course, he's my best friend, I'd do anything for him" Jean states matter of factly before clasping his hands over his mouth, surprised by his own response. _Holy shit_. I burst into laughter. Oh my god that was the most beautiful thing I have ever experienced in my short 18 years of life.

 

"Keep it down back there!" I hear Mr. Oluo spit out at us. I bring my laughter down to minimal giggles and look over at Jean. He looks completely mortified, a horrifying scowl on his face. If looks could kill, I'd be fucking dead by now.

 

"Tell anyone I said that and I'll fucking kill you." He growls through his teeth, his face still flushed.

 

"Deal, but dude,  _that,_ was  _hella_ gay" I giggle some more while he just groans and hides his face in response. I decide I've caused him enough trouble for today so I busy myself by looking around the room. No way am I listening to today's boring ass lecture. Fuck that shit. 

 

I continue to browse over the room, my eyes flashing towards the clock. Damn, it's only been ten fucking minutes? Ugh, I honestly just want to get this day over with and go home, actually scratch that, I want to talk to Mikasa some more. Yeah, I definitely want that. 

 

I feel something tap my hand. Mina silently hands me a note and whispers softly. "It's from Mikasa. I don't know why she's sending this to you but I wouldn't dare question her." And with that she turns her attention back to the lecture in front of the class. 

 

My fingers graze along the folded edges of the notebook paper, daring myself to open it, but not quite ready. I take a deep breath. Then open it as I exhale.

 

_Laughing at another one of_

_your dick jokes?_

 

A smile plants itself on my face almost automatically as I take in the notes contents. She always finds ways to amaze me. Damn it if I'm not in love with how incredibly sassy she fucking is. I finally put my pencil to use and excitedly write out my response. 

 

**_nah just Jean bein hella homo_ **

**_& do u really think that low of me???_ **

 

I tap on Mina's shoulder and give her the note while motioning my head towards Mikasa. She nods her head in understanding. I watch as the note makes its way to the front of the class. The long distance is kind of ridiculous but the students’ fear of what might happen if they stray from Mikasa's orders keeps them compliant. 

 

I'd never would have thought Mikasa would be one to pass notes during class, but she's so smart she probably doesn't even need to pay attention anyways. 

 

I find the note back on my desk a few minutes later. The distance really causing a delay in how fast the message gets to me.

 

 _yes._  

Wow, all that waiting for that, I bet she did that on purpose. Stupid sexy sassy Mikasa. 

 

I find myself in a particularly good mood, and when I'm in a good mood, I make puns. Though that's usually all the time, but this is special. Oh Mikasa Ackerman, you drive me into making dick puns.

 

**_butt seriously I only do em when I feel_ **

**_em CUMMING on ;)_ **

 

I laugh internally at my A plus pun and giggle as I pass the note forward. It always surprises me how awesome I am. 

 

I eagerly await Mikasa's reply, playing with my pencil as I wait. The symphony of soft groans and whines indicates the arrival of my message. The kids must really be starting to get tired of being used as carrier pigeons. 

 

_Wow, someone sure is_

_COCK-y today_

 

 O. M. G. Fuck. She just made a pun, oh and not just any pun, a  _dick_  pun. That's a fucking level ten pun. Holy shit, she's amazing. 

 

I blush furiously, but not at the suggestive joke, oh no, I blush because I find myself falling even harder over her because of a pun. The fact that she just made a dick pun gives me the biggest fucking heart boner. 

 

**_now thats using your HEAD_ **

 

Of course the only way to reply to her pun is with another one of my own. And she clearly agrees with that logic because when the note makes its way back to my desk I find another glorious pun.

 

_I really hope I don't SUCK at these._

 

Ahhhhhhhh. She's  _so_ cute. She's absolutely perfect. Wow. Wow. WOW. Can she possibly get any cuter? Yes, I know in context dick puns aren't meant to be adorable but it's fucking Mikasa. I'm pretty sure she can make anything adorable.

 

I rattle my brain for another pun and find myself hitting the pun jack pot.

 

**_nah I think your headed in the right_ **

**_D-ERECTION_ **

****

I'm about to tap on Minas shoulders, but I find that she’s already waiting for me. She takes the note from my hands and rolls her eyes as she passes the note back up to its recipient. The moans and complaints seem to be getting louder as the piece of paper makes its way to Mikasa. I see that she starts talking to the guy next to her, who hands her the note, followed by said man cowering in fear and an exaggerated nod of his head. After that there is no more whines as the slip of notebook paper finds its way back to my hands.

 

_You sure have some BALLS_

_Making two dick puns at once._

I would think that after the third pun I would have stopped smiling, but I don’t. The smile on my face doesn’t even make its way to fade, instead it only grows wider, causing my cheeks to hurt. But it’s a good hurt. 

 

_**this is getting ri-DICK-ulous!!!** _

I pass up the note to only have it reach Mikasa right when the bell rings. Time sure flies when you’re making puns. 

 

“Don’t forget to do numbers one through twenty-two in your textbook tonight, brats!” I hear Mr. Oluo reminds us before he rushes out of the room before any of the students’ even have a chance to leave. Just another crazy day in math class for us. I quickly stuff my belongings into my backpack, not caring to organize them and meet up with Mikasa. I patiently wait for her to finish packing up her own things, having actually taken notes, she has more items that need to be put away. Once she finishes she looks up at me, a beautiful smirk on her lips, an eyebrow raised.

 

“You were right Connie, puns aren’t that  _hard_.” She purposely puts emphasis on the word  _hard_  in the most amazing way that makes me stop right in my tracks. I can only stare at her though because right then and there, amidst the loud crowded classroom, filled with kids rushing to leave and head home, is the exact moment that I fall in love with Mikasa Ackerman. 

 

* * *

 

 

Now, now, I know what you’re going to say.  _Connie, are you telling me you fell in love over a pun?_  And the answer to that is yes. Like I’ve said before, I am  _very_  passionate about puns. Now your second question.  _Connie, you’ve only known her for about a week or two, are you sure you’re in love?_  And the answer to that is also yes. Okay, your last question.  _How do you know?_  And since you look so confused, I’ll try and be as thorough as possible in my explanation. So sit back and relax because I’m about to rant to you as to how I’m sure I am in love with the most amazing girl that ever walked the planet. 

 

I know from her smile, the love I feel is as obvious as the small dimple that indents her right cheek whenever she smiles. No matter how many attempts are made to hide it, it’s there, even in the faintest turn of her lip, it’s there, and there is no point in hiding these feelings because no matter how hard I try, this feeling, it’s there. I know from her laugh, it’s as contagious as the adorable little snorts that bubble up when she tries to fight back her laughter. There’s no fighting the giggles that are sure to erupt after just one listen to her beautiful laugh, and there is no fighting this feeling. I know from her eyes, it’s as bright as the light in them whenever she’s amused, happy, or is feeling any form of emotion. I found she’s the most expressive with her eyes, and those eyes are bright, so bright that I find I’m blinded. Love isn’t blind, but it sure can blind. I know from her hands, the feeling is as steady as they are when they pull at her scarf, calm, sure, and I’ve never been so sure that what I’m feeling right now is indeed real. Lastly, I know because it’s her, this love is as persistent as she is. It won’t give up, and she would never even think of quitting, and I don’t think I could quit either. It’s impossible to stop, and I don’t think I want it to. I don't think it can.

 

I bang my head against the wall of my bedroom to stop any more horrifyingly cheesy thoughts. I automatically regret the action of defiance and quickly rub the new sore spot on my head. I grab my pillow and place it between the wall and my now bruised head, any form of pressure causing it to throb. Despite my efforts to get my brain to shut up, my thoughts continue to be bombarded with nothing but Mikasa. It’s starting to drive me insane, but besides the lack of sanity, I actually don’t mind. At least I wouldn’t mind if the insanity wasn’t becoming dangerous because I now find myself staring at my phone, about to ask Eren Jaeger for his adoptive sister’s number. 

 

I can’t believe I haven’t asked her for my number yet, and now I’m being forced to ask  _Eren_  for it. I should really get Armin's number as well, no way am I risking asking Eren for anything Mikasa related at all. And surprisingly enough Jean doesn’t have her number either... I'll just say I need help with my math homework, which isn’t technically a lie.

 

"Fuck it." I grumble to myself. My fingers quickly type up my message before I click send. 

 

**To: PissBaby**

**Aye bae c;**

 

I have the decency to start with a greeting. Okay. Actually I was just scared to jump right to what I really wanted to say and have Eren laugh at my request. 

 

**From: PissBaby**

**HEY!!!! UR NOT STIL MAD AT ME?!???**

 

**To: PissBaby**

**Nah man it cool... Aye can I has Mikasa's #???**

 

**From: PissBaby**

**HAHA WOW!!! U REALY WANT THOSE 50 BUCK HUH?**

 

Does he really think I'm that selfish? Jeez rude as fuck. I roll my eyes at the text, even though Eren can't see it, unfortunately. I type up my perfectly crafted excuse. 

 

**To: PissBaby**

**I need help with hw fucktwat ;P**

 

**From: PissBaby**

**OH YEAH!!!! U 2 HAVE MATH 2GTHER LOL I 4GOT**

**HAVE FUUUUNNNN**

**(562) 547 8926**

 

I keep myself from squealing and let my finger ghost over the number. I spend more time than necessary making a new contact for Mikasa and even choose to go to the bathroom before finally deciding it’s time to grow up and finally text her. ' _Okay, here we go Connie'_

 

At first I write a huge paragraph full of unnecessary information and creepy questions, but delete it right away, feeling embarrassed. I keep it simple instead, not wanting to seem desperate or insane. 

 

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**Hello ;)**

 

 _Shit!_ I accidentally sent a winky face instead of a normal, non-threatening, smiley face! Oh no. Fuck. I wait for about five minutes in complete nervousness because of my silly typo, before my phone informs me that I have received a new message, but I only stare at the lit screen. My gut flips and dips, and I completely try, but fail, to ignore the feeling, and read the new text.

 

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**Who is this?**

 

Damn it, I knew I should have at least put who it was. Then again.... I should take advantage of this. And I end up doing just that, enjoying the rush that comes with teasing her.

 

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**Guess baby** ❤

 

I laugh at my own stupidity, hoping that Mikasa will find it just as hilarious as I do. But my smile quickly fades as I read the new message I’ve received.

 

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**I'll fucking call the police you piece of shit. This better not be another fucking idiot trying to send me dick pics. Do it you mother fucker, I fucking dare you. But just know that I WILL find you.  Fuck the police, I’ll find you myself and shove your phone so far up your ass that every time you receive a call your ringtone can be heard from every single fucking hole in your body. Got that? Now, LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE.**

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**HOLY SHIT Mikasa its CONNIE :C**

I don’t dare make a joke, the fear of having my IPhone shoved up my rectum, keeping me from doing so. The next message comes a few seconds later.

 

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**OH MY GOD! Connie I’m so so so sorry. I thought you were one of Eren’s jerk friends. Last year he gave a bunch of guys my number so he could join the football team and I kept getting a bunch of dick pics. I’m so SO SO SORRY.**

A laugh erupts from my lips from how quickly her mood changes from murderous queen to apologetic angel. I take that as a green light to resume being an idiot and make some more lame ass jokes. Teasing her is just _way_ too much fun.

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**It’s ok but… speaking of dic pics… would you like one of my own pickle? c;**

A smirk sits itself on my face; I’m excited to see where this may go. I now completely ignore all the homework on my bed and put every bit of my attention on talking to Mikasa. Even if it doesn’t happen to be face to face, just the idea of conversing with her is enough to make me giddy with excitement.

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**WHAT???!??!?**

 

I take a quick trip to google and search for the perfect picture. I find a very awe striking one and declare it perfect for my dear Mikasa and send it right away.

 

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

****

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**OMG Connie, you almost gave me a heart attack! >:c**

I giggle at her response, but mostly at the adorable little emoticon. Finding it even cuter by picturing her doing the same expression, and it’s absolutely adorable to say the least. A cheeky grin makes its permanent home on my face as I continue to text Mikasa.

 

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**lol u rlly think I would send u something like that? Haha xD**

**srry I couldn’t help myself**

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**Well, now I feel like I should return the favor.**

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**Would you like a picture of my boobies?**

Oh gosh, I know exactly where this is going, having done the ol’booby joke myself. Its cliché as hell, but I amuse her by playing dumb, which is something I’m really good at, if I do say so myself.

 

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**0///0 WHAT**

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

 

 

Sure enough there is my favorite bird, the majestic blue footed booby. There she goes again, taking my breath away, god fucking damn it. I giggle like a little girl and quickly type up my response. 

 

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**srry babe butt my booby is sexier**

****

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**LOL**

**From: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**So, how did you get my number? Not that I’m complaining.**

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**Oh hahaha Eren gave it 2 me**

**Hope u don’t mind**

**To: Mikasa es Tu Casa <3**

**I need help with math hw**

I add quickly in an attempt to sound less creepy then I already do. I don’t get a response, oh no, instead my phone begins to make another sound, not to alert me of a new message but a ringtone to notify me of an incoming call. Someone is calling me. _Mikasa_ is calling me. _HOLY SHIT!_ Why the fuck is she calling me?! Wait! Why the fuck aren’t I answering?!

 

I let my phone ring longer than necessary as I try to find my voice. My eyes shut tight as I finally answer, more from adrenaline, than actually finding any form of bravery.

 

“H-hello?” my voice cracks. Fuck.

 

“Hello, it’s easier to assist you over the phone so I called instead.” She says calmly, her voice not wavering one bit, unlike mine that sounds forced and awkward.

 

 “O-oh,” I chuckle nervously. “I just wasn’t expecting you to call me, so I started freaking out.” My voice continues to betray me as it cracks at almost every other word that leaves my mouth. I start to fidget, switching the phone from one ear to the other, then back again.

 

“So which problem do you need help with?”

 

I kind of regret saying I need help now, and was honestly just going to copy Jean’s work, who probably copied from Marco. But I might as well actually get something done, and I also don’t think I’d be able to stand any awkward silence that would take place without a topic of discussion.  

 

“Umm…all of them?” I chuckle as my hand finds my Pre-Calculus textbook and opens it to the assigned page. I open my notebook as well, pencil ready in hand, when I hear Mikasa sigh.

 

“Well, let’s start with number one then, I already finished all my homework so I have all the time you need to help.” Of course she freaking did, fucking perfect Mikasa. “What specifically do you have trouble understanding?” She speaks up while my hand writes out the first equation, her voice soft in my ear.

 

“ _Everything…_ ” I breathe out, giving my homework an evil glare.

 

A soft chuckle comes from my phone, followed by her clearing her throat. “All right   then, let’s get started.  You seriously did not pay any attention at all today, did you?” She giggles the last part out. God her laugh is so hot, that’s a normal thought to have, right? Laughs can be attractive, I think…

 

I scoff and try to sound as offended as possible. “Uh, for your information, there was _someone_ distracting me, if you _must_ know.”

 

Her small laugh sounds incredibly beautiful in my ear, and I find myself wishing this conversation actually was in person, just to hear it up close.

 

 We finally decide, well _she_ does, to stop messing around and actually get started on mission impossible: helping Connie actually complete his homework assignment for once. God bless Mikasa, because she even ends up helping me complete the homework for all my other classes, despite her not having some of them. It makes me feel like a complete ass, but in the end I’m just glad I’m able to talk to her for as long as I have been. My eyes glance at the screen of my phone. Damn. We’ve been at it for _three_ fucking hours.

 

A knock at the door, makes me jump as I finish putting away my contents into my backpack, the phone balanced between my ear and shoulder. My mother opens the door before I even give her the consent to enter, typical.

 

“Sweetie, dinner is almost ready.” She looks at me and then at the phone. “Oh! Who are you talking to?” A smile on her face as she asks.

 

 “N-no one! I mean… just a friend.” I stutter, as I shift my phone over to my hand and place it next to my ear to cheek if Mikasa is still there, making it painfully obvious that it is most certainly not ‘just a friend’. The other line is completely silent, except for the static of soft breathing.

 

“Ooh, a girlfriend.” She teases, putting a hand on her hips, still standing at my door.

 

“W-what!? Yes! _Wait!_ _NO!_ The answer to that is _NO!”_ my brain isn’t thinking clearly and I find my mouth speaking for me before I even think of what I’m saying. “I mean I _wish_ she was, but don’t tell her I said that! Wow, you don’t even know her! What am I saying?! But gosh mom, she’s so amazing! I know you’d like her, her name’s Mikasa. She’s so pretty and has the cutest laugh ever! Ma… what do I do? I think I really like her…”  I look over at my mother with a small pout on my lips.

 

She just blinks at me with wide eyes and brings up her hand to point at her ear, a gesture I don’t understand. What the fuck does that mean? Wait… oh. _Oh._ FUCK. I drop my phone, letting it land on the bed, realizing I just fucking said all that shit with my phone still at my ear. Shit! She probably heard everything! Oh my _fucking_ god! What the fuck am I supposed to do? Someone please _kill_ me now!

 

“Um-I I’m going to go check on the food, good luck with that sweetie!” and with that my mother shuts the door, leaving me to wallow and suffer on my own.

 

I cautiously pick up the phone and raise it to my ear, holding my breath as I do so. Whelp, there’s no avoiding it, I might as well just confess.

 

“H-hello?” My voice comes in a high pitched squeak. I pray for a reply, but at the same time, hope none comes.

 

“Connie?” Her voice is almost a whisper. I hear her sigh in relief, followed by giggles. Wait a minute! Why the fuck is she laughing!? Is it because of what I said? Fuck I just made a huge fool of myself, she’s laughing at me the one moment I don’t want her to find what I say funny. I was utterly, and completely serious, but it seems she thinks otherwise.

 

“Do you really think I’m pretty?” I can almost hear the smile in her voice. Oh, she’s not laughing at me because she finds what I said funny, she’s laughing because she’s happy I did, and meant it. Well that makes sense.

 

“Yeah.” I mumble so it’s hard for her to understand, but of course she hears me loud and clear.

 

“T-thanks.” A pause. “So, you really like me, huh?” I can hear her trying to sound indifferent about it, but she is clearly struggling to keep the façade. I swear she’s teasing me at this point.

 

“Y-yeah.” I gain some confidence in my voice now. I don’t want to lie about my feelings. No. Especially because it’s Mikasa, she deserves the truth more than anyone.

 

“Cool.” Another long pause, then a shaky breath. “I-um I li-” The rest of her words come out in a jumbled mess I can’t understand.

 

“What?” I question her, honestly having no clue to what was just said.

 

“I…I like you too Connie. Well it’s kind of obvious, I did say yes to going out on a date with you.” She pauses. “You’re very interesting, and funny, and I’d be lying if I didn’t say I find you pretty attractive as well…” she chuckles nervously, something I never would have thought Mikasa would ever do. She doesn’t continue after that. Oh crap, she’s waiting for me to say something, uh…

 

My face feels like it’s on fire, my cheeks burning to the point where it’s almost painful. She _likes_ me? _ME?_ _‘I guess I’m funnier than I thought.’_

“And I kind of l-like the concept of being in a relationship with you too…” She adds, the cool demeanor of her voice wavering ever so slightly. I realize I still haven’t replied and that my breathing has been coming out in ragged breaths. _‘Chill’._

“R-really?” is all I can manage and even then the word comes out broken.

 

“Yes. So, uh-“I hear her clear her throat. “When exactly do you want to go out on that date?” I have to keep myself from blurting out ‘NOW’ and decide on a better wording.

 

“The sooner the better.”

 

“I agree, how about tomorrow? I don’t have work on Tuesdays.”

 

“Yes!” I yell louder than intended, never having replied that fast in my life before. She just chuckles in response and I find my phone beginning to ring again. What the fuck?

 

“Hey, um, Eren’s calling me?” I notify her of her interrupting adoptive brother.

 

“Go ahead and answer it, I have to go shower and get ready for bed. I’ll see you tomorrow Connie. I’m really looking forward to our date.” I almost let out a shrill squeal at the last sentence, but keep my manly composure.

 

“Me too! Goodnight!” I sigh dreamily as I hang up and answer Eren’s awaiting call. “Hey sexy.”  I answer in a sultry tone.

 

“Stop talking to Mikasa, she’s been giggling and laughing for _five_ hours straight! It’s weird as fuck!” he yells at me. Instead of feeling threatened though, I feel a rush of excitement flow through my veins. I can’t believe she’s acting like that, because of _me._ _I_ have that effect on her. _ME._

I let out a breathless laugh. “Dude! You scared I _actually_ have a chance? Besides we already stopped talking. And it was only _three_ hours!”

 

I can practically hear him roll his eyes through the phone. “Whatever, just because you can make her laugh doesn’t mean anything! _SHIT_! Aye, I’ll talk to you later! I totally forgot about my fucking homework! Later loser!”

 

 “Bye bye shithead.”  I spit back before he hangs up.

 

I lay back on my bed, my head hitting the pillow, as I let out a dreamy sigh. I can’t wait for tomorrow… I begin to daydream about all the possible ways our date can turn out.

 

It isn’t until I’ve imagined the twelve different ways I could hold her hand, the six ways I could tell her that she’s beautiful, nineteen ways to initiate a kiss, and the one way I could tell her I love her, that I finally drift off. It’s the best sleep I've had in a long time.


End file.
